You want to get divorced, but you do not want it to be an ugly split. You’re dedicated to making it a healthy process for all involved, especially because you have children. So, how do you do it?

To help you, here are a few key tips:

  • Focus on communication. You and your spouse have to talk during this process so that you can work together.
  • Speaking of working together, make cooperation one of your goals. Don’t think of this as you versus your spouse. Think of it as you and your spouse trying to cooperate and find a solution together.
  • Don’t talk about things when you feel emotional. While emotions are a natural part of this process and you shouldn’t avoid them, you don’t want to lash out at your ex and ruin this process because you’re feeling angry or sad. Just take a step back and keep working after things settle down.
  • Don’t be afraid to talk to others. Set up a support network. Maybe this means talking to friends or family members. Maybe it means seeing a therapist. Whatever you need to make things go smoothly, put some emphasis on it in your daily life.
  • Keep a positive outlook. Focus on what your life can become, rather than the marriage that is ending. Make choices that are best for your future — not choices that make you hold onto the past.

As you work your way through the divorce, take the time to look into all of your legal rights and the options you and your spouse have.