You have probably heard stories about horrible, drawn-out divorces — if not in your own circle of friends, at least in Hollywood. You know that you want to end your marriage, but you also know that you do not want it to go like that. What can you do to make things move smoothly and peacefully?

First and foremost, you and your spouse need to have mutual respect for one another. Don’t let your emotions control everything. Don’t think of your spouse as an adversary. Instead, just concentrate on respecting each other, being civil and focusing on the facts of splitting up your lives with as little conflict as possible.

Another thing to keep in mind is that it can help if you both share the same vision for the outcome of the divorce. Maybe you have kids together. Forget for a moment about who gets the house or even who gets more time with the children. Instead, make your shared vision finding a solution that puts their best interests first. Make decisions that have a positive impact on them. Things to consider could include:

  • Keeping them near their friends
  • Keeping them in the same school system
  • Sticking to the same routine
  • Giving them relaxing custody solutions for birthdays and holidays
  • Allowing them to interact and communicate with both parents easily

When you have this shared focus, it helps you avoid disputes and struggles that pit you against your ex. You work together toward your goals. That makes the entire process go smoothly.

As you move forward, make sure you know about all of the options you have to work with your spouse during your divorce.